Our country’s waistlines are a matter of national importance. Preventable obesity-related diseases are reducing our life spans, driving up healthcare costs and impacting the productivity our economy needs to compete. For Candidate Claus this is an issue of both national and personal importance.

No more bellies that shake like a bowl full of jelly; President Claus will institute new nutritional guidelines encouraging boys and girls to replace glasses of milk and plates of cookies with a healthy mix of organic fruits and vegetables.